The Newness of Old Love

As a writer, I tend to find inspiration in any and all areas. Today my muse is Gabrielle Union. Now there are many things that I can probably go on and on about regarding Gabrielle. However, right now I am enthused by her in the sense of being a partner. She and Dwayne Wade seem to have something very special and they are truly one of our favorite couples. Often things appear fun, and very passionate between the two, which is another thing we love. However, things have not always been roses. Gabby has fought through a bitter ex, infidelity, and career transitions for her spouse. That along with a recent piece where she spoke to some of the ways keeps the fire in their bedroom; I think we may all be able to take a few cues from Gabrielle.

Love is not easy I think that’s one thing we all know. With that being said, being in a relationship with someone who has to have a relationship with an ex is even harder. This is especially when that ex happens to be sour on your current situation and or how it may have ended for them. They seem to make the most minuscule tasks nearly unbearable. I have seen this destroy relationships due to the mental, emotional, and at times physical strain it can put on both parties in the relationship. That ex of your current partner can definitely drag some of your worst traits out of you as you attempt to navigate through the past of the one you love. That combined with being with someone who has been unfaithful would be an instant deal breaker for many of us. However, as we have seen that’s not always the case. Combine those conditions with being uprooted across the country to living conditions that are the polar opposites of what you have grown accustom to, and things have become even tougher. Would you leave your job or career, family and friends, comfort zone and support systems, just to travel across the country or world for an opportunity for the one you love? For many I know that’s a tough question. I know many people would be riddled with concerns of things not panning out, which could fester and eventually weigh on the relationship.

These are honestly things I find rare in our generation, and by no means am I saying one is wrong for wanting to hang it up due to those circumstances; it’s just something we do not see now. I have always attested today’s higher rate of separation to a lack of selflessness in relationships. I feel like putting individual happiness to the back burner for the greater overall good of a relationship is tough for people today. I always admired the love of my parents, aunts, uncles, extended family, and grandparents due to reasons like that. It’s what I hope to have in a relationship myself one day. Love of the past seemed to focus on the couple more than either party alone. We often see people challenging themselves to make things better for the greater good. We see couples fight through many if not all trials and tribulations.  However, I have often been told many of the things I desire do not exist in today’s world. That has always troubled me, but I feel like those traditions are not things that should have been abandoned. It seems that type of selflessness, patience, and sacrifice are old fashioned, and I have no clue why. It may be partially due to our generation’s struggle with foresight, or our tendency to make knee-jerk reactions. One thing for certain is it can definitely be tied to the need for instant gratification.

This is what I found so intriguing about as it pertained to Gabrielle and these qualities. I am sure it was not easy and that it took work on both sides, but I am confident it took a significant effort on her behalf. It seems her and their greatest priority is their wellbeing and happiness as a unit, which is a huge factor. I think that’s something we all need to embody. To add, I am sure most of us have heard the sentiment “To get where you are going you have to know where you have been”. Maybe it’s time we look into some of those old traditions so we can successfully move into the future.


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